Showing up

This Monday is not going to be top of the line for me and Monday’s With Mary.

I toyed with so many ideas this week and they just didn’t feel ready, they didn’t feel right.  I said from the beginning that I wanted to be real and honest and this week I couldn’t find something that was both meaningful and genuine.  So here I am.  Reminding myself that half the battle is just showing up, (and this kind of showing up is laying in bed with one eye closed, in my pjs, typing on my laptop) and writing something is better than writing nothing at all.

I can relate this a lot to working out. It is hard to give 100% effort 6 days a week.  Everyday you show up it isn’t always going to be your best performance.  You aren’t going to be setting new PRs every time you step into the gym.  And you sure as hell aren’t going to feel like a hundred bucks either.  Showing up truly is half the battle.

I have felt slightly distant in my workouts lately.  Not my strongest or fittest performances by any means.  Finals are coming up and I have been studying a lot and abusing how caffeine makes me focus just a little bit more.  I have felt sick to my stomach and down right exhausted but I know showing up to the gym and getting a little sweat on gives me body and my brain the medicine it needs to keep pushing through these last 4 days (!!!!!!!) of school.

I took this weekend to sleep in and totally stay away from any stimulants, I am feeling a little more present to start the week and thats a blessing in itself.  Sometimes you just have to be kind to yourself and say that you showing up is a lot better than what other people are doing and that is good enough for today.  I think I did that with every workout I did last week.  I started to beat myself up about it and I remembered that not every week is going to be your week.  You aren’t superwoman MaryClaire- it is okay.

Am I a little frustrated that I can’t give what I normally do to my workouts?  Yes.  Do I know that right now I have to prioritize memorizing metabolic pathways and all the microorganisms I’ve learned in the last 4 months?  Yes.  Am I freaking proud of myself  for waking up at 4:45 every morning to go get my sweat on, even if its not my best performance?  HELL YES.

We aren’t all going to be the fastest and strongest.  But you can ALWAYS do the best for you on that day that you decide to show up and just do it!

I am not embarrassed that this isn’t my best work, and in the next year there will be more days that I have zero clue what to write about and I am just trying to put words down.  Today I did that.  I just showed up and gave MY best for TODAY.

Show up today and be the best you can be, you never know what might happen.

Stay positive, be grateful xxx

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